Bring out your dead

Thomas Veil

Thomas Veil

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So this has been going on lately.

After most of the previous two years without event, a couple of people on my wife's side of the family got hospitalized with Covid.

One is uncooperative, on oxygen but refusing the ventilator they are recommending. He's been discharged once but returned with blood clots in his legs. They gave him blood thinners and re-admitted him, but the doctors don't sound hopeful about his prognosis, which comes as no surprise.

The other I know a little more personally. Really nice guy, but he spent the last month in the hospital. They sent him to ICU where a couple of days ago he coded. They brought him back. Last night we got the word that he's dead.

The common factor: many people on my wife's side of the family, including these two, belong to a conservative church that doesn't go in for masking or vaccines. Neither of these guys was vaccinated even once. Imagine spending several hours every Sunday and Thursday singing in a single room church with about a hundred other people.

It's just so stupid and unnecessary and makes me hate religion even more.

I kind of intended this to be a topic where we talk about people we know who are in serious condition or who have died. I didn't intend it to take a turn into religion, but that is at the root of what happened. While the second guy was still alive, his wife was posting things on Facebook like, "Praise God," and "God is great!" Yeah, let's rely on that.

*Sigh.*

So does anyone else have a story about a friend or family member who's hospitalized?
 
It’s a pretty common theme unfortunately. Having being redeployed to a general hospital twice during the pandemic I saw plenty of this and as it stands currently 80%+ in the ICU for COVID are unvaccinated. Their reasoning varies from religion, to a lack of trust, to overestimating their ability not get infected, to conspiracy theories. A friend of mine works in Texas and definitely has seen a lot of of the Christian religious ideology getting in the way. Same with a friend in NYC and some sects of ultra-orthodox Jews.

In my experience most of them when they are in the hospital struggling to breathe regret their decision. But you still have some that consider this God’s will. Maybe they consider the vaccine a gift from God?

I routinely deal with having to convince new patients at the psych hospital I work at to get vaccinated. Many of these people are not delusional or psychotic (rather being treated for depression, anxiety, addiction, OCD, personality disorders, etc) and have the state of mind to make decisions for themselves.
Ultimately these people are adults and have the legal authority to decide what they want to do with their bodies, even if it’s not in their best interest (or the interest of the community). I’ve been through the stages of disappointment, sadness, frustration, and anger. Honestly, at this point I’ve accepted there is only so much that can be done to educate/persuade these people and they are going to make the decision they make.

It’s unfortunate, but I can only hope these unnecessary, preventable deaths (or serious cases) will convinced like-minded friends and family to change their mind. It’s clearly not the ideal solution but it’s the best case in a worst case scenario. And fortunately (or unfortunately), I have seen serious cases and deaths change peoples minds.

Don’t get me wrong, I think people are incredibly misguided if they don’t want the vaccination and I will do everything I can to try and convince them otherwise. But letting their decisions deeply affect my emotions is something I just don’t have the energy for at this point. At some point you have to accept that unless some highly unlikely vaccine mandate occurs, this is the way it’s going to be.

All that said, I don’t think trying to persuade these people to get vaccinated is a cause worth giving up on. Negativity typically is not effective and only solidifies their resistance, having a compassionate conversation, listening to their concerns and addressing each one is far more effective.

——
Edit: Also worth mentioning, in the private company I own a small part of (residential psych program), we fired an employee for refusing to get vaccinated. That was after much persuasion, many long talks, and giving him a couple deadlines. Kinda of an unfortunate situation, but safety comes first.
 
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My aunt and uncle were vaccinated twice and had made appointments for their boosters, but had not yet gotten the boosters when they went to a party for one of their daughters. Another attendee had "just a mild cold" and infected several of the guests with covid. This was around the end of November and my uncle spent two months in the hospital until he died last week. My aunt made a full recovery without requiring any hospital care.
 
MarkusL said:
My aunt and uncle were vaccinated twice and had made appointments for their boosters, but had not yet gotten the boosters when they went to a party for one of their daughters. Another attendee had "just a mild cold" and infected several of the guests with covid. This was around the end of November and my uncle spent two months in the hospital until he died last week. My aunt made a full recovery without requiring any hospital care.
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No words.

My sympathies.
 
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