Tech Dad Jokes

[Yoused]

Never noticed this before,

I am not touching that one.

 

[Herdfan]

 

[Yoused]

Dad, what did you do before there was GPS?

We used maps.

No, I mean before Google.

 

[dada_dave]

 

[dada_dave]

Jonathan Arnold (@jdarnold@indieweb.social)

Attached: 1 image So painful but necessary

indieweb.social

 

[theorist9]

Proton walks into a bar. Bartender says "We don't serve neutrons here." Proton says "I'm not a neutron". Bartender asks "You sure?" Proton says "Yeah, I'm positive."

Neutron walks into a (different) bar. Bartender asks "What are you having?" Neutron says "Give me a beer." Bartender gives the neutron a beer. Neutron asks "How much?" Bartender says "For you, no charge."

Bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve FTL neutrinos here." FTL neutrino walks into a bar.

 

[rdrr]

Proton walks into a bar. Bartender says "We don't serve neutrons here." Proton says "I'm not a neutron". Bartender asks "You sure?" Proton says "Yeah, I'm positive."

Neutron walks into a (different) bar. Bartender asks "What are you having?" Neutron says "Give me a beer." Bartender gives the neutron a beer. Neutron asks "How much?" Bartender says "For you, no charge."

Bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve FTL neutrinos here." FTL neutrino walks into a bar.

And along those lines. In the window of our science building there is a sign that reads,

"Protons have Mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic!"

 

[Yoused]

There has to be some kind of joke about how I tried to get into studying the Tau but there was so much negativity that it just did not last long.

 

[casperes1996]

There has to be some kind of joke about how I tried to get into studying the Tau but there was so much negativity that it just did not last long.

I tried to study Tau. Dropped out halfway through though. Made a career baking Pi

 

[theorist9]

I remember taking a QM class in which the professor asked "If two operators commute, what does that mean?" I answered: "It tells us they couldn't afford to live closer."

 

[dada_dave]

Alex Wild (@alexwild@mastodon.online)

Attached: 1 image I guess it's ValANTine's day. Love bites, sometimes. #Ants #Insects

mastodon.online

I guess it's ValANTine's day. Love bites, sometimes.

 

[dada_dave]

 

[ArgoDuck]

^ took me a moment to parse the "SCART" bit - duh!

 

[dada_dave]

 

[dada_dave]

If the pickle fits … or err …

BrianKrebs (@briankrebs@infosec.exchange)

Attached: 1 image What's the best thing you've seen all day?

infosec.exchange

 

[Yoused]

The remodeler told me that they had to do our countertops in wood because they are anti-formica.

 

[Herdfan]